{"id":5365,"date":"2013-01-15T09:14:58","date_gmt":"2013-01-14T22:14:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wordconstructions.com.au\/blog\/?p=5365"},"modified":"2013-01-15T09:15:00","modified_gmt":"2013-01-14T22:15:00","slug":"drop-of-honey-in-your-writing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wordconstructions.com.au\/blog\/2013\/01\/drop-of-honey-in-your-writing\/","title":{"rendered":"A drop of honey in your writing works"},"content":{"rendered":"

Some years ago, I opened a saving account with a higher interest rate for the proverbial\u00a0rainy\u00a0day. I haven’t used that account much for some\u00a0time but received a letter<\/a> from that bank\u00a0 that I wanted to share.<\/p>\n

Threatening feel<\/h2>\n
\"Angry<\/a>

Threatening people’s savings doesn’t create a good impression<\/p><\/div>\n

With opening words ‘Inactive account’, the letter launched with a long paragraph\u00a0about money in\u00a0inactive accounts being transferred to ASIC. The paragraph ended with a ‘by the way, the Government recently changed the inactivity period to 3 years from 7 years’ message.<\/p>\n

It went on to define in active accounts.<\/p>\n

Followed by a sub-heading “Your inactive xyz account”.<\/p>\n

At this point I was angry because I hadn’t been told about the change in law nor that my money would be transferred to ASIC so “how dare they do that”.<\/p>\n

The letter then mentioned I could prevent the transfer by using my account before the end of January.<\/p>\n

Why not tell me that first as it is actually the most important thing for me to know?<\/p>\n

And encouraging me to make another deposit is surely in the bank’s best interests, too?<\/p>\n

Why let me get angry and annoyed rather than show me they are trying to help my keep my money?<\/p>\n

The harsh letter made me uncomfortable, and as I only had a small amount of money left in there, my response\u00a0was to withdraw all my money and close the account myself.<\/p>\n

This is obviously a necessary letter for banks, but I think they are missing a relationship building<\/a> and marketing opportunity<\/a> to write it in such harsh terms.<\/p>\n

Even if most people still closed their accounts, they would do so without negative feelings towards that bank…<\/p>\n

It could have been personable and helpful<\/h2>\n
\"happy<\/a>

Being friendly builds goodwill and reduces stress<\/p><\/div>\n

In contrast I recently wrote a letter for a client along similar lines.<\/p>\n

That letter effectively read:<\/p>\n

You haven’t made a contribution for some time so your account is about to be classed as inactive.<\/p>\n

If you make a contribution by xx, your account will be reactivated. Otherwise, your account will have to be closed.<\/p>\n

Another option would have been\u00a0 to write:<\/p>\n

Did you know that any account without transactions for 3 years are classed as inactive? And that we have to transfer money in inactive accounts to ASIC?<\/p>\n

To avoid this for your account, please make a deposit or withdrawal by xx.<\/p>\n

Or they could have focussed on the change in law as important news:<\/p>\n

Did you know it’s been nearly three years since you used your account?<\/p>\n

The Commonwealth Government recently changes the law so accounts are classed as inactive after 3 years rather than seven. That means your account could soon be classed as inactive.<\/p>\n

By law, we must transfer money from inactive accounts to ASIC.<\/p>\n

Of course, you can reactivate your account by making a deposit or withdrawal before xxx.<\/p>\n

Which version would you prefer to receive?<\/p>\n

\u00a0* Images courtesy of kozzi<\/a><\/address>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Some years ago, I opened a saving account with a higher interest rate for the proverbial\u00a0rainy\u00a0day. I haven’t used that account much for some\u00a0time but received a letter from that bank\u00a0 that I wanted to share. Threatening feel With opening words ‘Inactive account’, the letter launched with a long paragraph\u00a0about money in\u00a0inactive accounts being transferred […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[49,321],"tags":[905,1722,1601,1602,1721],"class_list":["post-5365","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bad-writing-examples","category-marketing","tag-letter","tag-marketing","tag-personable","tag-threatending","tag-writing"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t